Saturday, April 17, 2010

Overwhelmed

For me, one of the challenges of being a stay at home mom, is that I don't want to appear to be on "vacation". I know that people who have been SAHMs or who know women who have been SAHMs, understand that staying home with kids is not exactly the picnic, walk in the woods and/or party that it would seem.

Before I became the "Domestic Goddess" I am now, I thought staying at home with kids was the easiest thing in the world. In fact, I'm ashamed to confess, I couldn't figure out why an at-home mom couldn't get all of her chores done and still have plenty of time to pursue all of her hobbies and dreams. After all, she was at home all day and all she had to do was hang out with kids!!! Yes, that was me. I was that woman - the one who looked down her nose at the the little house wife and her quaint role as wife and mother.

As they say, "paybacks are Hell". I have been at home with my kids for almost 8 years now. My house is constantly trashed, up until recently (when my husband took over the job) my bills were mostly overdue, my sink full of dishes, mile high piles of laundry wait to be cleaned or folded (depending on their location. Laundry to be washed is piled in front of the washer, laundry to be folded is piled on our bedroom floor).  In my most humble opinion, I suck at being a stay at home mom. The only thing I think I'm really good at, is lovin' on  my kids. I hug them, smooch them and tell them I love them quite regularly. But that's it.

So there you have it. Because I was the woman who thought staying at home was a piece of cake, I think I'm extra sensitive and paranoid about how others view my current vocation. And in my heart, I'm always feeling I should be able to at least keep up with the things I need to do, with a little extra time to read a magazine.

And sometimes, because I care too much about what I think others think, I accidentally over commit. Like maybe now. I have many things to accomplish for an art event at my sons school, which is in 2 weeks. I'm also working on coordinating a couple of things at my favorite art gallery. I want/need to clean my house and I would love (LOVE) to be able to do some art today. I feel a little overwhelmed with what needs to be done, yet here I sit, typing a blog post about how much stuff I have to do. This is so typical! I even procrastinated like this in college (ya know, back when I thought everyone else had it so much easier than me). Maybe I ought to get off my hiney now and tackle my to do list (maybe I should actually write a to do list). Then I might not feel so overwhelmed.

Before I go, I have to share with you two of my "favorite" comments.

#1 - I was at a restaurant where the owner was a woman with small kids. When I told her I was a SAHM she said: "you are so spoiled".

#2 - a college kid I worked with at a retail job I had for awhile: "My mom never had the privilege of staying home. She had to work her ass off..."

Thanks for stopping by and listening to me ramble. I hope your weather is as glorious as ours, here in Mid Missouri. Enjoy the weekend!

2 comments:

Artoholic said...

I hear you!

Saying "No" is the hardest part to new-time sucking committment requests. I get guilted into it all the time.

Persist & Persevere!

Cheers,

Cindy

Laura Pugh said...

Thanks for your comment, Cindy. I know that almost every mom alive can relate to being overwhelmed!