The Tiny Voice and the Flitter of Panic

Sometimes while I'm doing some chore, like dishes or laundry or driving a kid somewhere, I think about my little business. I wonder to myself what I should do next. What can I do to get some people to notice me and to get more traffic to my blog and Etsy shop? Should I promote more in the forums and on other blogs? Should I make more things to add to my shop?

Whenever I think I should make something new, there is a little flitter of panic. The tiniest little voice that says, "what if there is nothing left to make? What if you are all out of ideas and you couldn't put something new in your shop if your life depended on it?"

I hate that tiny voice. But instead of freaking out and calling the tiny voice all kinds of nasty names, I just say to myself (very calmly), "well, it's possible that could happen. Maybe I am out of ideas and all the creative energy is gone. I'll just have to wait and see I guess." Remaining calm, helps me not give "power" to the tiny voice.

The fact is, the past year has been the most productive (creatively speaking) time of my life. I have loved every minute of it. I love having new ideas, I love being able to put the ideas down on paper (or canvas) and I love that one idea can lead to another and another and another. Prior to this, I was really stuck. I called it being "creatively constipated". I wanted so badly to make something - anything but I was too afraid I would make a mistake or make something really bad. I just kept buying supplies and thinking about what I could make.

The best thing that has happened to the creative part of my brain, is that I've given myself permission to make bad stuff. Things that are ugly, or weird or stupid. So I don't have to worry about mistakes. I make them, then move on.

I like being in this place much better than the constipation thing. And if someday I do run out of ideas, I could probably make a bunch of money by selling all my supplies in a garage sale. Until then, I'm just going to make stuff and not let the tiny voice steal my joy!

Here are some paintings I've done that I don't think are posted anywhere else:







The flower picture is called (this is so clever) "Flowers in Blue Heart Vase" and the other is called "In Celebration".

Much Better

The photos I took last night turned out much better than the ones the night before. I'm glad. They aren't perfect, but I can still post them and that's all I want right now.

I have some random drawings floating around that I've worked on within the past few months, weeks, days. This one was in my sketchbook and is one of my favorites. I used my new Prismacolor colored pencils to color it. I love my colored pencils, they are so fun to work with.

I had planned to color this whole image in, but kind of like it the way it is. I don't have plans for it, just like to look at it.

I'm rambling tonight because I'm tired and need to go to sleep. I just wanted to stop in and say "hi!"

Until next time....

I Ain't No Photo-grapher!

I'm not sure why, but listing things in my Etsy shop always seems so incredibly overwhelming. Since I've convinced myself it's a hard thing to do, I tend to procrastinate - which is how I solve many of my life challenges (maybe I'll address that particular issue in another post...). And of course, procrastination rarely solves anything. In fact, most of the time it creates a whole other list of problems.

I have a pile of cards and magnets that I would love to sell. However, since I won't list them, I am the only one who knows I have them. They aren't doing me much good sitting around collecting dust in the Craft Cave. So last night, I made a light box, got my dad's fancy schmancy camera out (he loaned it to me months ago). I was so proud of myself. With every shot, the weight of procrastination became lighter and lighter, until I was finished. It was about 12:30 a.m. or so, but I decided to take a look at the 300+ photos I took. Here's just a sample:

You might be asking yourself "what's wrong with these photos?" well, nothing, if you like your photos to be YELLOW. Every picture, ALL 300+ of them are YELLOW! Man, I'm mad! I spent at least two hours trying to accomplish this task and all my photos look like poop!

Like any good Etsian, I took my frustration to the Forums:

Photo Rant

And the most wonderful thing happened: within 5 minutes I had at least 18 posts from people providing solutions. That is one of the many reasons I love Etsy. I can sit in my basement, in Columbia, Missouri in the middle of the night, send out a cry for help and people from all over the globe offer their support. It blows my mind.

Thanks to everyone who posted on the thread. I sure appreciate it. Now, I'm off to try to do my photos again. Since I'm armed with more wisdom than I had last night, I'm sure everything will turn out fine!

The Robot Gathering

In March, my dad was in the hospital. While I was waiting for him to get out of surgery, I drew this picture. I love robots and I was pleased with how this turned out.

Normally, it's hard for me to come up with things that I consider halfway original. All I did here was think about some different shapes and made those shapes into heads and the robot bodies just followed.

I made this specifically for my son, but haven't given it to him. Since it's in my sketch book I'm not sure what to do with it. Do I recreate it on canvas? Do I print it and color it, do I just rip the page out and give it to him? Not sure yet.

It's Like Riding a Bicycle Up a Hill

It occurred to me that having an Etsy shop is like riding a bicycle. In theory, I like bike riding, it's fun and I love the feeling of the wind blowing through my hair (I mostly wear a helmet now, but sometimes to be a rebel, I don't). I like how free it feels to be on a bike, peddling kind of fast and feeling like I'm part of nature. In a car, I'm all blocked off from fresh air and it's more like watching the scenery go by in a movie.

The reality of bike riding for me is that it hurts my rump, I'm not in good shape, so it hurts pretty much everything else too. (Please keep reading for the explanation of how Etsy is like bike riding... )

When I was dating my husband and living next door to him, he loved going for early morning bike rides before work. He wanted me to go with him and I did, but I made him pay for it. I whined about being up so early, about it being too hot and I only wanted to ride on flat roads. If we came anywhere near something that had any sort of incline, I would say: "that's not a hill is it?" So in that sense, bike riding for him was a pain in the rump too!

Somewhere along the line, I did encounter a hill that I had to ride up. I put my bike in the right gear ("the little circle") and peddled and peddled and peddled until I got to the top. And when I got to the top, I felt good about the accomplishment, but also felt like I was going to pass out 'cause I worked so stinkin' hard to get up the hill.

So this is the part that reminds me of having an Etsy shop (or anything I'm trying to do to sell art). It's a hill and I'm trying to ride to the top. I'm peddling, peddling, peddling, keeping my head down so I don't see how far I have left to go, but concentrating on what I'm doing now. I'm not telling myself it's too hard, too far, too long, I'm just peddling. And as I do, I can see some progress. As I blog, as I Twitter, as I post in the Forums, as I take new pictures, make new banners, write new descriptions, I can see some progress. I have more people following me on Twitter each day, more people viewing my blog and Etsy shop and I'm getting to be in contact with more people than I ever thought possible.

I have a long way to go and a lot of work left to do, but I can tell that some of my efforts are taking me in the right direction. Toward the top of the hill. Even though my rump hurts, I'm happy to be heading somewhere and meeting people along the way!